Retch

how much hatred can i possibly hold in this heart? that's what i wondered, when i saw him walk toward me from the other direction today. there was nothing different about him from day "one" of what i learnt to love about him. the usual swanky walk, lost gaze, laptop slung on one shoulder. i cannot tell what his thoughts were as he moved, but there he was- his steps only bringing him closer to me and mine too nervous to retrace. i looked away for a minute. he did too. then we looked at each other again. it was as though we were reflecting it all in mirror action. then we both broke into what was something between half cry, half smile, half scoff and half laughter. just as he crossed, i asked- when did you come? asti, he said and i couldn't fathom why i had asked the question.
here's the man who dispels everything i appreciate about men in a few minutes of push, pull, drag, punch and kills the woman, who is capable of love.

he passed. i kept walking ahead and there i was on the street, retching, as though everything inside me would jump right out of me on the road.